Tips for Supporting Older Adults during the Holidays

1. Ask about feelings and memories, but don't assume they will be positive.

Ask questions like: "What were the holidays like growing up for you?"; "What are some memories you have around the holidays?"; "What are the holidays like for you now?". Avoid asking questions that assume the older adult had a positive experience (i.e. "Why do you love the holidays?") or assume they celebrate a particular holiday (i.e. "What's your favorite part of Christmas?"). It's 100% appropriate to discuss the holidays! Respect if the older adult doesn't want to discuss them and whatever feelings might come up in discussing the holidays.

2. Offer support and give space to process.

Reflect back how the older adult feels about the holidays (i..e "I hear you and it sounds like the holidays are a really tough time or you" or "It sounds like you really look forward to the holidays and they are your favorite time of year!"). Don't be afraid to lean in with the older adult and hear about what emotions are coming up or listen to some of their memories. You can lend a listening ear as the older adult processes their feelings

3. Collaborate to find positive activities / connections.

Work together to find positive forms of connection through the end of the year! This could be a virtual event (like Coffee for Clio), taking walks with neighbors, organizing a holiday card exchange with loved ones, setting up phone calls with loved ones, or finding time for a loved activity!

4. Honor the experience - don't impose.

Whether the older adult you speak with is over the moon about the holidays or processing difficult feelings - let's all work to honor that experience. They may not always want to see things differently or find a solution, but you can be there to be a listening ear and let them know that they are allowed to have whatever feelings are coming up!